This post represents some rambling about post-university life. The thoughts. Feel free to ignore.
Iceland is less than 13 days away. A few days ago I thought it was 10 days away as a result of doing some terrible math. I was both pleasantly and sadly surprised that the number ended up increasing to 14 (now 13) days. On the one hand it meant a few more days to mentally prepare myself and finish up a few things. On the other hand, LET ME GO SOONER! This will be the first time I’ll really be travelling on my own, with no guarantee that I’ll meet someone I already know at the destination. Well…other than that motorcycle trip I did on a whim the previous summer, but that’s a different story altogether. Maybe I’ll mention that sometime. This time it’ll be longer than that trip. This kind of trip is something I’ve been itching to do and the buildup has taken place over a period of years.
Each passing day of not having any classes has been an odd experience. I suppose I should have been out and about applying for jobs and such, but really I’m not in the mood for it. I keep putting that off for when I do get back. I’m quitting my part-time job so when I do get back I’ll actually be unemployed. Luckily I’m still living with the rents and I don’t mind it one bit. There is that desire to move out on my own and make it out there in the world! But now I keep questioning the point of doing that. I’m not really sure what it is I should be doing. I guess what I’m trying to say is that post-university, that is the “real world”, is chaotic and makes no sense. It is full of structure, complications, hypocrisies, and confusion. Just like this paragraph. In school, we strive towards a pre-given goal. It seems to work okay for most people. Come graduation, and it’s all about survival. No, it is not about finding your passion, life dream, or saving the world. You can’t do any of those sorts of things if you end up without food or shelter. I could be wrong and anyone could argue against the following statement.
Chances are if I were able to somehow pick you up and plop you into a situation in which you live nowhere (everything else being as they are for you now, family, friends, location, and money), you would find a way to get a place to live and find something to eat first. The ways of doing this would vary from person to person of course. Crash at a friend’s place, crash at you parents, buy/rent a place if affordable. Buy some McDonalds, go to the grocery store or coffee shop, or go through some trash. Those sorts of things take time away from you. You could have the greatest ideas, but they wouldn’t mean crap if you didn’t have the time to share them with people. Everything takes time. For most of us, making money takes time. Learning takes time. Relaxing takes time. Finding your passion takes time. Saving the world takes time. Yeah, basically everything takes time. And we don’t like to think about this, but we don’t really have a whole lot of time. Even at 22 I’m finding a lot of moments passing by faster than ever before. Most of us end up trading our time for money. That money then, in theory, lets us do the things that we want to do. Often, this isn’t the case. We’re either too tired or don’t feel like we have the time. Or “I don’t have enough” yet.
Yet, the “real world” is also full of wonder, joy, and things that make ridiculous sense when they shouldn’t. Oh yes, I forgot potential. In the past few years leading up to the present, I’ve begun to see how everything is tied together. All the problems that should be solved become more complicated. Rather than making me feel worse about those problems (i.e. environment, poverty, human rights) I’m amazed at how everything just ends up working as it is.